I’m sexy and I know it

I was browsing through Foschini’s new collection the
other day when I overheard a conversation that made me smile. 3 young ladies, probably around 20 or so were in the lingerie section and looking a bit uncomfortable. They kept picking up something and holding it like out in front of them like it was an alien object. It seemed that one of the group was planning for that ‘big night’ and wanted to be prepared for it but for the life of her couldn’t fathom why any of the tiny but expensive pieces of material was in any way sexy

The whole scene took me back a few years ago when I
went through the same thing. It was hilarious. My friends and I went looking for the perfect outfit. I had in mind something long and silky, something simple that made me looked elegant yet experienced. What I found was the exact opposite. Apparently my years of reading historical romances had not prepared
me for the real deal.

Till then I had barely bought a decent bra for myself,
my mother was in charge of that and I chose comfort over looks, besides, I need support, not sex appeal! What had a gotten myself into? There were nighties and teddy’s, thongs and g-stings, and stuff that I don’t even think had names. They came in purple and blue and black and pink and combinations of all of the above. Some were gauze, others silk, some had beads and strings and bows and some had almost nothing at all.

I had heard that lingerie was supposed to make a woman
feel sexy and powerful, from looking at these racks of material all I felt was out of depth and little bit panicky. I couldn’t even figure out how to put on one or two of them! My friend picked out one that she thought was perfect for me, it was a pale purple with two thin straps, a lace bra thing and then flared out to just over my hips. I held it over me wondering where on earth I was
supposed to fit my boobs! My friend then informed me that the bra part wasn’t meant for coverage. Oh, right.

Eventually I bought something that seemed to suit my
tastes. It was black and silky and didn’t take brain surgery to figure out; I just put it over my head. It came with matching underwear and these stocking type hings with little straps that I was yet to figure out. As soon I got home I tried it out. Everything went smoothly until I had to figure out the strappy thingies. They were supposed to hook into the pantyhose and then hook up into
the underwear. It looked pretty good on the model but in reality it’s very different. How was I supposed to hook the back one? I tried to manoeuvre myself in the mirror so that I could see what I was doing but realised that I was acting like a dog chasing her tail! Is this what women go through or was it just me? Do men have any idea what women go through for them? And was lingerie
supposed to be this complicated? After an exasperating 15 minutes and few holes in the pantyhose, not to mention an aching neck I threw the stupid things in the bin

Now of course, I can look back and laugh but at the
time I felt stupid and inadequate. But I’m glad I had the experience, when I recited the story to my (now) husband he laughed and assured me I looked perfect in sloppy pj’s. It broke the ice and made me feel much better

Now that I have more experience and I’m able to put on
something without hurting myself I realise that sexy underwear and lingerie does have the power to make a woman feel confident and powerful. But I’ve always wondered, what’s the male version of sexy underwear?


17 thoughts on “I’m sexy and I know it

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